Just Babbling

Workshop Jitters

A workshop is defined as a meeting of group of people in which they engage on a particular topic either through discussion or an activity, well that’s according to Google and I believe it. Now if you’re someone who is into something such as cooking or playing an instrument, or even acting, it’s given that you immerse yourself into activities to help develop those skills. Hence, the purpose of workshops. Although, there’s always the concept of “self-teaching or self-taught” but I won’t go into that.

So, I’m into writing and I’m not exactly new in this endeavor but I do need a heavy dose of guidance, help, and intervention. I wasn’t exactly born with an innate talent of storytelling and writing, but I guess you could say I may have a hidden potential (naks!). Forgive me, sometimes I don’t know how to give credit to myself. Anywaaaay, having said that, it is expected that I should attend workshops, right? I mean, like I said, I need intervention, so merely relying on myself for improvement isn’t really helpful for my writing.
And yet, it’ll take me a long time, many years actually, to face that fact. I don’t want to blame anything like the lack of resources (aka funds), or no time to spare, or no opportunities to join. Because that’s not exactly the problem.

It’s because I have this irrational fear of workshops.

As I mentioned earlier on, I wasn’t born with such talents; it’s just something I wanted to do and didn’t care much about how it’s going to be perceived by potential readers. So, attending these workshops would mean sharing your work to strangers. And just the idea of strangers listening to me share my work, triggered all these negative energy I never thought I have. I get intimidated and I feel so insecure that I started doubting myself. I have this picture in my mind that the other participants are judging me.


A few months ago, I was given the opportunity to participate in a writing workshop, set up in the mountains, miles away from the town proper, and no network signal. Perfect setup for a workshop, right? Yeah. It was facilitated by Isa Garcia and she was amazing.

To be honest, I’ve somehow expected someone who looked like your stereotypical teacher or instructor, someone in their 40’s to 50’s with their hair either cut short or high up in a bun, with glasses. But it was the opposite. She was in her late 20’s, hair down, and she doesn’t wear glasses. Plus she’s bubbly.

Anyway, the experience was a lot less intimidating as I thought it would be. I’m not surrounded with people who are experts in the field. I mean they write well but they don’t look as if someone who’s going to judge you. There were a couple of kids and a mother so I definitely felt at ease. That weekend totally change my mind.

I’m aware that workshops will always differ with the setup and atmosphere, at least now, I’m prepared now even though there’s still this lingering fear way back of my mind. But I never imagined myself to actually enjoy it. The discomfort and uneasiness? Gone. If only these workshops weren’t that expensive, though. I would’ve joined a few more after that session. But it’s okay, I learned a great deal.

Just Babbling

Artsy Weekend

Sometimes when you just want to go somewhere new that gives a bit of a unique experience, you will have to venture outside the metro.

And that’s what we few weekends ago. We went to Pinto Art Museum in Antipolo for some culture trip. Not because we are connoisseurs of art or critics or whatever, but there is something within us that felt so at home in this kind of place. Plus, the place is practically photo shoot haven for anyone who owns a mirror-less camera/DSLR/smartphone.

It was a rainy Sunday morning, aaaand it was a bit crowded. The place is brimming with visitors and most of them were in groups. We could spot a lot of photographers roaming around looking for a spot (with no or at least less people) to take a snapshot but you could feel there was a bit of a struggle on their part. Anyway, we roamed around too, going to any spot for photo ops and at the same time, of course, appreciate the art as well.

I find the art installations more interesting, though. It’s more eye-catching than the paintings. I’m not saying the paintings were blah and uninteresting, there were a lot that I thought to be thought-provoking. Altogether, I applaud all these artists. Checking out all these works of art somehow stirred my creative juices, you know, it kind of made me a bit envious because these artists made something beautiful. And I also want that to.

Just Babbling

Paddles Up

In my whole 30 years of living in this planet, I never would have imagined myself getting into sports in general. Not really a fan of anything that’s guaranteed to make you exhausted and will make you sweat a lot. Except dancing, because dancing is much more fun. Anyway, maybe I can attribute this hate to my low endurance and history of asthma. You see, I get tired easily; a simple jog will have me panting as if I ran a mile. So, I’d rather watch them than be a part of anything sporty.

Flashback from more than a year ago, I got myself involved with the sports, Dragon Boat rowing. I didn’t join because I wanted to but I must admit that I was interested. So I hopped in. Aaaand, it was the most exhilarating and at the same time exhausting thing I ever did in my life in a span of 1 hour. I’m not even sure if I was going to continue doing it or just a one time deal.

Well, it wasn’t just a one time deal because I just got back from the 2nd leg yesterday. Spent the whole day by the bay, enduring the heat. You know it, it looks like I’m here to stay (don’t know until when, though, but I’ll make the most out of it).

Why did I even decide to stay you may ask. Getting up so early in the morning; going through some intense training before I even go to work; spending my Saturday training instead of sleeping in. Honestly, I’m not exactly sure why I pursue this thing. I don’t exactly enjoy enduring the aftermath of intense training; waking up with sore muscles, and can barely move.

And Manila Bay isn’t exactly a place you’d want to go to early in the morning. Though, I got used to the stench I still have to keep in mind that the water of Manila isn’t exactly clean (I squirm whenever I see any floating stuff: trash, dead fish, and greasssse). But, amazingly, I’m able to keep it all in. I no longer mind even if the water splashed towards me, my face, especially on my eyes and mouth.

Maybe I have this little competitive spirit in me that has been waiting to spring up and take over me. Like I said, I’m not good with sports. But instead of giving up, I find myself working harder to perfect the technique, and to take in all the instructions given.

Maybe I love the exhilarating feeling, that feeling of fulfillment of being able to accomplish something that I really worked hard for.

And maybe I wanted to do something that is totally outside my usual routine and prove to myself that there is something that I can be good at.

Still have a lot to learn, though. Lots to improve. But I also just want to test my limits. This is one of those rare moments that I really need to work hard in order to gain the desired results.

So, am I stopping anytime soon? Maybe not yet.

And besides I want to experience victory. Who wouldn’t? So, until I can endure it, this dragon boat thing is going to be part of my routine.

*Disclaimer: I did not take these photos, they were grabbed from Facebook and messenger. Credit to the owners.

Just Babbling


And that is how we enjoy life. Laugh, never mind if you look silly, savor the moment.

I’m making a big move. Well, not so big move. Actually, I don’t think it’s something you’d call a move. It’s just that I decided to start on a clean slate, somewhat. Kind of in a process to revamping this personal blog of mine, to make it more, uh, engaging and something worth of anyone’s time.

I want to create something worth reading that I can actually bring anyone to tears or laughter. Yep, goals right there. It’ll definitely be a difficult task, challenging too, but at least it’s something that should motivate me. And besides, isn’t that the point, to make your readers relate to you at some point. Regardless if you’re writing a fiction or a non-fiction piece, you want your readers to relate or at least inspire them.

Not really a rookie in this game, but I have lot to learn. I guess, you could say I’ve been like dormant; I was just here but basically not doing anything. And that’s bad for my writing. It’s a skill that needs honing and yet, I just let it be. Hence, my somewhat suckish writing. I know I’m being hard on myself but I need to douse myself with cold water and accept this harsh reality. Funny thing is, I asked my mother to buy me books about writing and I haven’t read a single book yet. This is sad. And I need some kind of intervention.

And just when I’m about to question everything about my ability to write, I was thrown into metaphorical pool that tested my skill. You have no idea how I struggled so much. I thought it was going to be easy like a simple essay writing or whatever, but it was like a slap on my face when I realized that it wasn’t going to be a smooth ride.

Since that happened, I needed to do something. Badly. I’ve been practicing, you know. However, I still lack the commitment to do it as often as it should be. I really want to blame my other extracurricular activities but I know that’s wrong. I simply need to give time to my writing as every writing expert would say.

Hence, the revival of this blog (for the nth time, that is).

So, I’m starting all over again. I don’t mind, though. I’m very much open to this restart, that way I could actually evaluate myself in this endeavor. No, I’m not going to start writing profound works or compelling stories, I’m just going to continue writing what’s on my mind or in my heart, or anything under the sun but it’s not going to be write-whatever-you-want-to-write kind of thing or unnecessary rantings.

And I’m going to post photos, more of them as compared before. I’m not a photographer but I just want to share some things through my perspective.

So, there. The restart, uh, starts now.

Captured, This Is What I Call Writing

Moving Forward


Lone river flowing serenely;

So calm and peaceful, a contrast in this vibrant city.

Hypnotizing, my mind wandered aimlessly.

Black and white pictures in my mind,

Unpleasant thoughts I left behind.

It came clawing back striving for light;

Day won over the darkness of night.

Painful memories now shattered,

As I say farewell to the ghost of the past, my mind now filled with laughter.

*This image was taken at the Cheongyecheon stream near the Insadong district in Seoul.