A workshop is defined as a meeting of group of people in which they engage on a particular topic either through discussion or an activity, well that’s according to Google and I believe it. Now if you’re someone who is into something such as cooking or playing an instrument, or even acting, it’s given that you immerse yourself into activities to help develop those skills. Hence, the purpose of workshops. Although, there’s always the concept of “self-teaching or self-taught” but I won’t go into that.
So, I’m into writing and I’m not exactly new in this endeavor but I do need a heavy dose of guidance, help, and intervention. I wasn’t exactly born with an innate talent of storytelling and writing, but I guess you could say I may have a hidden potential (naks!). Forgive me, sometimes I don’t know how to give credit to myself. Anywaaaay, having said that, it is expected that I should attend workshops, right? I mean, like I said, I need intervention, so merely relying on myself for improvement isn’t really helpful for my writing.
And yet, it’ll take me a long time, many years actually, to face that fact. I don’t want to blame anything like the lack of resources (aka funds), or no time to spare, or no opportunities to join. Because that’s not exactly the problem.
It’s because I have this irrational fear of workshops.
As I mentioned earlier on, I wasn’t born with such talents; it’s just something I wanted to do and didn’t care much about how it’s going to be perceived by potential readers. So, attending these workshops would mean sharing your work to strangers. And just the idea of strangers listening to me share my work, triggered all these negative energy I never thought I have. I get intimidated and I feel so insecure that I started doubting myself. I have this picture in my mind that the other participants are judging me.
A few months ago, I was given the opportunity to participate in a writing workshop, set up in the mountains, miles away from the town proper, and no network signal. Perfect setup for a workshop, right? Yeah. It was facilitated by Isa Garcia and she was amazing.
To be honest, I’ve somehow expected someone who looked like your stereotypical teacher or instructor, someone in their 40’s to 50’s with their hair either cut short or high up in a bun, with glasses. But it was the opposite. She was in her late 20’s, hair down, and she doesn’t wear glasses. Plus she’s bubbly.
Anyway, the experience was a lot less intimidating as I thought it would be. I’m not surrounded with people who are experts in the field. I mean they write well but they don’t look as if someone who’s going to judge you. There were a couple of kids and a mother so I definitely felt at ease. That weekend totally change my mind.
I’m aware that workshops will always differ with the setup and atmosphere, at least now, I’m prepared now even though there’s still this lingering fear way back of my mind. But I never imagined myself to actually enjoy it. The discomfort and uneasiness? Gone. If only these workshops weren’t that expensive, though. I would’ve joined a few more after that session. But it’s okay, I learned a great deal.